The Weirdest Christmas Ever

Where's Waldo? (Personal Photo)

Regard our family Christmas photo. Anything seem... strange to you?

Call me selfish, but I didn’t go home for Christmas. Plane tickets home are pricey, jet lag is a pain and really, when it’s between Spain/Nice, where I’m outside wearing a t-shirt and drinking in the cerulean skies, and Canada, where the polar vortex is causing heavy snowfalls, ice storms and power outages... Well, what would you do?

 Ever seen Christmas with the Kranks? That’s what this year felt like—like I was skipping Christmas. There’s no snow, it’s warm, and I wasn’t with my family. But I do have an awesome pair of French neighbours who seem to have adopted me, dropping by with random gifts (to date: nail polish, a dress (unfortunately, too small in the shoulders, so I couldn’t keep it), rainbow gloves). Whenever I try to bake them something, they always put a slice of cake on the plate when they return it! They’re also the ones who contacted my landlord after my apartment was almost broken into, and they’re always on the look-out for suspicious activity. Since then, my neighbour has invited me to eat a galette des rois with her to celebrate the New Year (but that’s for a later post!)

And did I mention that she invited me for Christmas Eve dinner à la niçoise?

*clears throat*

Scaaarrrfff (Personal Photo)

On the Veille de Noël, my neighbour gave to me:*

• Twelve ounces of rosé
• Eleven buttered bread slices
• Ten spoonfuls of foie gras
• Nine helpings of scampi**
• Eight cups of mussels
• Seven slices of duck
• Six types of vegetables
• Five minutes for a stretch break!
• Four types of cheese
• Three bûches de Noël
• Lindor chocolates
• And champagne—our favourite “bubbly”!

* Sorry, foodies, no pictures of the dinner! But take note of all the seafood!

** and oysters—fresh from one of Yolande’s friends

I brought a bottle of wine as a gift, but we did not drink it. Naturally, Yolande had already chosen wine to accompany our meal: a rose to go with all the seafood (that being said, red wine does go with cheese). This did not surprise me, as I know these sorts of things, and I did not insist on my bottle being opened. We supped with her daughter, so it was all of this food just for the three of us! She even got me a scarf and nail polish! Earlier in the month, I gave Jean-Pierre and Yolande their own gifts—Christmas mugs filled with chocolates and tea.

We ate for about four hours straight, chatting the whole night. According to my Dad, according to my landlord, according to Yolande, my French was “impeccable.” (Aww, yeah!)

15 C, even in January. i.e. T-shirt weather. (Personal Photo)

Christmas morning was mine alone, although I spent most of it unpacking from Spain and packing for my next destination—Germany (next post). I busied myself until my family back in Canada would be awake and called for a video chat using my Blackberry Playbook.

It’s the first year, in fact, that I’ve spent Christmas (and Thanksgiving, for that matter) away from my family. And it looks like Easter will follow, but Ill tackle that hurdle when I get there.

It’s not quite the same watching your brother open yours presents and his presents. Really, he gets twice the fun and I’m stuck there, looking in and making funny faces on the screen. Or when he gives you chocolates that you CAN’T EAT because you’re in France... (Yeah, I didn’t expect any sympathy—“I’d go to your [event], but I’m in Europe... boo hoo” doesn’t work, either.)

I did, however, get to see how my parents and my brother reacted to their personalized gifts (compliments of online shopping, which I’m really getting the hang of!). David’s Tea has this “Provence” tea with lavender reminiscent of the part of France I’m residing in, so I got them that, among other things.

Between that and spending the evening with some of my Canadian classmates, it was a good two days of craziness! But the craziness would spiral into madness... and insomnia...

TO BE CONTINUED...

Nobody Expects This Post

Inside the Sagrada Familia, Barcelona (Personal Photo)

What did you do during winter break, Laura?
Have you visited Spain? It's a beautiful place.
Laura, how's Europe? Are you enjoying it?

I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition.
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

The city I visited in Spain was Barcelona, Barcelona and Madrid... Madrid and Barcelona. The two cities I visited were Barcelona, Madrid... and Toledo. The three cities I visited were Barcelona, and Madrid, and Toledo and Sevilla. The four ... no... Amongst the cities... Amongst the cities I visited... are such cities as Barcelona... Let me try this post again.

Get on with it!

Barcelona:

A friend asked me, “So, does the rain in Spain fall mainly in the plains?”

The answer is: “No. The rain in Spain falls mainly in Barcelaine.”

Arc de Triomphe, Barcelona (Personal Photo)

But even though it rained during my stay in Barcelona, I did not enjoy the city’s charm any less. I did another free tour, which was nice, since the historic centre of Barcelona is akin to a maze. The way our guide described Catalonia and its own language (Catalan) and desire for independence reminded me of Quebec’s efforts to separate from the rest of Canada. On my own time I visited the Arc de Triomphe (in brick) and the Sagrada Familia cathedral, which is as of yet unfinished. The outside resembled melted stone, as though it were not rock, but wax. In the pouring rain I ate some delicious, hot-from-the-deep-fryer churros, which burnt my tongue but warmed my insides. Mmm!

My hostel was not only inexpensive, but nice (and came with free breakfast). Oh, what a pleasure it is to stay at a nice one! My room even had a curtain that I could use to block off my own space, and breakfast was more than just cereal and bread. (The first time a hostel came with breakfast was during my weekend getaway to Bologna. Needless to say, it hadn’t impressed me.) I grabbed tapas with two of my roommates, Kim and Jimin, and then we grabbed probably the least Spanish thing there is—bubble tea.

Ok, Laura, you’re probably saying. That’s all fine and dandy. Where’s the action?

Patience you must have, my young Padawan.

Basílica i Temple Expiatori de la Sagrada Família,
Barcelona (Personal Photo)

For Eurail users, Spain is a pain—as far as I know, you can’t make your reservations online; rather, you need to do it in person, or perhaps over the phone, too. At this point, I had no trains booked at all, unnerving for someone who likes to plan out everything! The train I wanted left at 9am (there was another at 10am, but sooner = better). I caught the metro at 8:25 and arrived at 8:45... and all the ticket booths were closed. The place was a ghost town. At this point, I had exactly ten minutes before the train left. So I ran to customer service.

Figures I’d experience a train strike. What else is new?

The customer service agent rushed us a group of us through security (scanning your bag in a conveyor belt) and onto the train, where we would pay for our reservations (Eurail) or buy a ticket. They even held the train for us and didn’t leave until we’d gotten on! This is why you always rush, people—it often makes the difference! (Spoiler alert: I didn’t have to pay the reservation fee—the individual who was supposed to do that never came around.)

Alfonso XII Monument, Parque del Retiro,
Madrid (Personal Photo)

Madrid:

Madrid didn’t have the same “old” feel as Barcelona, but I did have a ball taking photos of its architecture. I did my own self-guided walking tour in two 2.5-hour strolls, doing first the east and then the west ends of the city. I also bought a gorgeous scarf at one of the Christmas markets. In Madrid, I booked the rest of my train tickets, the only hiccough there being that I had to be in first class for the Seville-Barcelona train (a five-hour journey, so at least I was comfy for a long time). My hostel not only offered breakfast, but sangria and paella (a Spanish rice dish with seafood) on Friday and Saturday, which happened to coincide with the nights I was staying there!

Royal Palace, Madrid (Personal Photo)

I should mention the beggars. I've seen a couple on the streets, but one woman was on the subway, carrying a young girl in her arms and moaning in Spanish. It's the perfect language in which to wail, “Por favooor, Senoooor...” Later I saw a scrawny man running to people and saying, “Mama, Papi, where are you?” to random strangers. I also saw a man who started playing “The Saints Come Marching In” on a trumpet.

Toledo:

Toledo (Personal Photo)

Rather than doing a second day in Madrid, I opted to do a day-trip to Toledo, a medieval town situated an hour away by bus and known as the city of three religions.

Toledo was stunning. The cobblestone streets were a maze of twisty little passages, all alike, and the whole historic city made me feel like I had been transported into a different era. It was here that I bought and sent my first postcard to my friend Brittany, who had been begging me for one for a while. I also caved and bought some jewelry, a black and gold cross with coordinating earrings. Toledo was definitely a highlight of my trip, and I am glad I went there instead of spending more time in Madrid. I am sure there was much more to see in Madrid, but there was something magical about Toledo.

Sevilla:

I had an insider guide to Sevilla, compliments of Alex, one of the girls I bumped into in Rome. She recommended some excellent sights, such as the Plaza de Espana, as well as a fantastic place to get tapas. It was surprisingly warm, and I paraded around in my t-shirt and laughed at those wearing sweaters and scarves. It was a beautiful city, and I wished I could have stayed longer.

Laura, you’re thinking, I’m more. More juicy details, please.

View from the library, Toledo (Personal Photo)

Fine. I’ll indulge you. I got hit on (I think) by a persistent Spanish guy while I was chilling in the common room of my hostel. He spoke with his mouth completely full of food, so I could barely understand him, and it was absolutely disgusting. He also gave of “creepy vibes,” so I was glad I wasn’t alone in the room with him. His Spanish lesson began normally, with words for good evening and such, but then I’m pretty sure (again, difficult to tell when his mouth was full) he was asking me if I went to the bars or drank coffee. I said no. Then he pointed to himself, then me, and then make walking motions with his fingers and said, “To the bar? Or for coffee?”

At that point I gave a much firmer no, said I had to leave, and retreated to my room. I also said that it was hard to understand him when he was eating. Goodness! Obviously, if I’m travelling alone, that means I’m single and interested, right? 

Plaza de España, Sevilla (Personal Photo)

Except, as it turned out, he was sleeping in the same room. When he spoke to me I gave clipped answers and didn't look a him (partially because he was changing.. right in the middle of the room, even though we had a nice private bathroom). On my way out the door I saw him grab silver clothes from the luggage room. He was also wearing silver facepaint. Then I understood his earlier comment about being an artist—he was a living statue. However, he didn’t bother me again for the rest of my stay.

Satisfied with the amount of drama? Good.

I grabbed chocolate con churros while waiting for a tapas restaurant to open its kitchen. Los Coloniales. Fantastic place—I’d highly recommend it. You have to put your name on a waiting list to get a table, though, and arrive before the kitchen opens at 8:30pm, as it’s incredibly popular. I ordered a Spanish omelet and some pork in a garlic and whiskey sauce, and together it was only 5 euros (plus the cost for the bread basket, which you pay for regardless of whether you eat it or not).

Sevilla (Personal Photo)

On my last day in Sevilla, I did a walking tour with a local. He talked about Sevilla’s more recent history, including its former dictator, Franco (“the little motherf*****”as he called him—apparently it's taboo to talk about him). At the end of the tour I had to powerwalk to my hostel and then to the bus stop. I caught the bus with a minute to spare and made the train, although with less of my safety margin left than I had hoped (but that's why we have safety margins, right?). Then train ride was uneventful save for a constantly screaming baby and a toddler who ran up and down the aisle for most of the ride.

I flew back to Nice the next morning, but not before bumping into a girl named Juli, a fellow Canadian from Ontario. During happy hour we each got a 750ml glass of sangria (2 for 1). Let me tell you, speaking with a fellow Ontarian was refreshing! We had a great time and talked until 2am, when our bladders told us it was time to return to our rooms.

Good times in Spain!

I Amsterdam

I know I haven’t posted in a while. Between exams and booking my holiday trips (which you will read about in due time), I’ve put my blog on the back burner. However, I’m going to post double time so that the adventures you are reading aren’t *completely* out of season. Now, without further ado... 

I got yelled at by a prostitute on my first morning in Amsterdam... 

Dam Square - Amsterdam (Personal Photo)

But I’m getting ahead of myself. When I mentioned I was going to Amsterdam (mid-November), people heckled me about it, asking me if I was going to a) light up a joint in a coffeeshop or b) indulge in the carnal delights in the red light district. I mean, there’s nothing else worth doing there, right? Seriously? 

Canals in Amsterdam (Personal Photo)

Amsterdam is a picturesque town of canals, a city of narrow buildings squeezed together like novels on a bookworm’s shelf. Despite the cold and rainy weather, cyclists sped by like Hell’s Angels, all but mowing down unsuspecting pedestrians. During the day the city is calm and tame, save for the banshee cyclists, and seemingly innocent. That being said, you can still see bored prostitutes in windows if you accidentally wander into the red light district, which remains discreet beneath the all-seeing eye of the sun. But at night, the shadows purr with seduction’s call. Beneath windows lined with red halogen tubes, women wearing nothing but fancy, glow-in-the-dark lingerie pose, beckon, smile—anything to attract attention from potential customers. And when the scarlet curtains closed, the windows empty, it means the bed is occupied... with a client. 

 This trip heralded the first flight that I’ve ever booked, and in terms of travelling itself, everything went smoothly. However, staying in a mixed dorm is an interesting experience for a solo female traveller. As I experienced in Florence, guys don’t seem to be concerned with their privacy. In fact, an Australian guy came in from his shower wearing only a towel in order to retrieve his clothes and then proceeded to change beneath his towel, all while carrying on a full conversation with me while I pretended that absolutely nothing was bizarre about the whole fiasco. At one point two other guys ripped off their shirts. You know, all casual-like. I joked to some of my former travel buddies (on my phone) that I didn’t need to visit the red light district when I had guys--three of them, in fact--stripping shirtless in front of me and parading about.

Delft pottery (Personal Photo)

I did my first “free tour” in Amsterdam. Free, that is, as the only way the tour guide is paid is through tips. The fact that it rained the entire time did not dampen the tour (well, I suppose it did, in a literal sense), although it gave me a chill that took all evening to shake off. I did a tour of Amsterdam’s coffee shops (NB: not the same as a coffee house) and learned several facts about cannabis in Amsterdam. Contrary to popular belief, it’s not *actually* legal. Rather, any laws are simply not enforced.  

He posed for several other people, too (Personal Photo)

I also visited Zaanse Schans, a cute little town with traditional Dutch culture (most likely for us tourists), windmills, and a beautiful view of the river, which smells of cocoa. Regard the photo op moment with a goat, who posed with several other people and seemed to be enjoying himself. On another day, I saw Delft, which is known for its blue-and-white pottery. By chance, the pottery factory had free entry that weekend only, as it was the end of the season.

Me in the I Amsterdam sign (Personal Photo)

 I got my honorary photo in front of the “I Amsterdam” sign and saw a gorgeous sunset. I did not miss the Anne Frank House or the Rjikmuseum, either, but the fact that I went isn’t terribly

interesting, is it? No drama there.

Here’s an interesting experience: on my way to the train station, I saw floats and people with black face paint in jester costumes who danced, played instruments, and distributed candy to children holding open small plastic bags. No candy canes here! Santa Claus was on horseback rather than a sleigh. Who knew I had picked the weekend of the Santa Claus parade?

Sunset in front of the I Amsterdam sign (Personal Photo)

I had my first problem with security on the return flight. The night before I left, I spotted a dragon head in a souvenir shop and just had to have it (I call it the Amsterdragon (photo)). You can apparently burn incense in it and the smoke will leave through the nostrils. Anyway, at the airport, the head showed up in their machine and they flagged it as suspicious, so they asked to search my bag. However, my searcher was pretty nice—after showing the bubble-wrapped head to his colleague, he returned it to me and we had a brief chat about where I was from. Success! 

Oh, and as to why I was yelled at by a prostitute? I had my camera out. “NO PHOTO!” she cried. I was taking a picture of a church, in broad daylight, with the free walking tour. If I hadn’t had my back to her, I suspect she would have smashed my camera (or something likewise dramatic)! They value their privacy.